MushiMinion

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  • Poor Things

    ★★★★

  • Hercules Returns

    ★★★★

  • Satan Place: A Soap Opera from Hell

  • Sssssss

    ★★★

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  • Poor Things

    Poor Things

    ★★★★

    Thank goodness Disney warned me about all the smoking.

    Another sterling entry in the Arthouse-Movies-With-Unique-Aspect-Ratios-That-Hate-Seagulls Cinematic Universe. I'm glad Willem Dafoe and Emma Stone broke out of superhero prison to do some real fucked up shit. I'd extend that to Mark Ruffalo, but I almost never see him in a role where I wouldn't rather see Edward Norton instead. Call it the Hulk Curse.

  • Hercules Returns

    Hercules Returns

    ★★★★

    Childhood is riffing over movies. Adulthood is dubbing over them to make something new entirely. Now if only someone could get this comedy troupe's take on Starcrash onto disc or streaming... Umbrella, what say you?

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  • Gonjiam: Haunted Asylum

    Gonjiam: Haunted Asylum

    ★★★★

    👁️👁️

    P͚̳͚̤̥͕̝͇̘S͉̼̠͝T̶̸͉͍͇̰͚P̶̶͙̞̘͕̩̖̤͖͜Ș̷̵͎̺̞̲̺͈͉͘T̨͏͔̘̹̬͕̞P̵̞̜̕̕S̲͓͓̠͓͡T̤̣̕͢P͉̪̟͇̻͖͠͡ͅS̘̲̥̤̮̮̀͞T̷̰̝͘P̶̫͔̤̥̪̬̟ͅS̷̨̜͍͚̼̳Ṱ̛̦̀͢P̝̜̹͚͍͖̹S̡̲̯T͉̪̯̦̮̖͎͍̺͞P͇̩S̝͓̥͎͘T̸̠̬͎̳͜P̸͉̙̀S̢̗͉͢T̫̳̞͕̻̞̦̖͘P̸̸͎S̲̮̠͖͉̙̫T̪̮̗̟͉̺̥͈͢P̴̖̣̘͈͘S̷͙̹̣̙̦̭ͅT҉͍̹̺̖P̶͇̝͎͎͖̩̰̟Ş̶͇̯̤̖͔͢ͅT͇͍̪̩̘̜͖̖͜͟P͚͖̪͈̮͇͈͢͝S̴̺̹͘T̸̫̺̜P̧͏̼̳̯̮S̟̠͕Ţ̴̠̲̞̤̜̘̀P̡͕͈͘͝S͟͏̸̜̙̲̯̩̼̪̳̜T̴͇͚͖̟͍̞P̴̱͖̘̰̮̖̹̼͠S̛̛͕̭̘̲̞͠T̜̮͈̱̟̱͟P̜̪̕͠S̢̯̹̱T̩̩̖̺

    As far as protégés of The Blair Witch Project go, Gonjiam: Haunted Asylum is genuinely unsettling in all the right ways. It only staggers briefly towards the end, when it begins to lean too far into familiar genre staples, reminding us that this found footage film is in fact just a movie... but not before scaring you with some disturbing ideas of its own first.

    Room 402 is not for the faint of heart.

  • Rapsittie Street Kids: Believe in Santa

    Rapsittie Street Kids: Believe in Santa

    ½

    The End of Evangelion of Christmas movies.