Star Wars: The Last Jedi

Star Wars: The Last Jedi ★½

Let the unfollows and disagreement comments commence...

What a massive, painful, crushing disappointment. I don't want to write a review so I'm just going to keep this short. Rian Johnson's The Last Jedi is more original and daring than J.J Abrams' previous Star Wars entry, Mark Hamill is great and there are some truly solid moments I won't spoil. But that's about where the positives end for me, and the myriad of disjointed, contrived and utterly stupid plot-holes and story-developments begin. Nearly every scene has lines or visual storytelling that is supposed to make people laugh, and it just didn't for me. I think I laughed once or twice, and the rest just fell flat.

But that's not all, from parts to feel straight out of a Harry Potter movie, to inexplicable constant character changes, to a mind-numbing endless stream of action sequences (this is by far the most action-heavy Star Wars film to date), punishingly protracted sub-plots, uninteresting & flat new characters, and a Domnal Gleeson, whose hammy, cartoonish portrayal of the caricature villain General Hux is also laughably awful. The film takes a lot of chances and goes into surprising territories, but nearly all the decisions made were, I felt, the wrong ones. Oh, and the over-use of the word "hope" here becomes as cringeworthy as the word "family" in Fast and the Furious movies.

The Force Awakens may have been unoriginal, but there are tons of moments that have seeped into my brain and had me giddy with joy and internal rapture. Here, between the non-stop action scenes there are some moments here and there that truly stand out, but it was mostly an overlong forgettable slog that took over 150 minutes and seven endings to finally conclude. I can totally understand people loving this, as it's very action-heavy, and thus fun for many, but that is something I simply do not enjoy in the slightest.

I know a rambling oration like this isn't my usual style of review, and I might attempt to write a proper one in the future, but this film had me seething with anger, and I just had to get it off my chest. There's still probably half I forgot to mention.

I'm definitely on #TeamPorg though.

Added to: [2017] – What I’ve Seen – [Ranked]

Added to: Star Wars Saga – [Ranked]

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