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  • Mulholland Drive

    Mulholland Drive

    ★★★

    Diet Celine and Julie Go Boating. AKA: The world’s artsiest pornographic acting (featuring Rivers Cuomo of Weezer!!!)

  • Upstream Color

    Upstream Color

    ★★★★½

    One of the most offputtingly ambient and consciously visceral experiences you can have in 90 minutes!

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  • G-Force

    G-Force

    ★★★★½

    Fuck you Ryan

  • Bernie the Dolphin 2

    Bernie the Dolphin 2

    ½

    I only watched this shitshow because a narcissistic bitch I knew and despise is in it. The only satisfying aspect of this pathetic excuse for a movie is knowing that her breakout role as an aspiring “actress” was such a horrendous failure.