all movies i watched before having this account are useless

Favorite films

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Recent reviews

  • Interstellar



    extremely good to vibe to, extremely bad to be forced to look at matthew mahogany for 3 hours

  • Some Like It Hot

    Some Like It Hot


    amount of thc in my body: 15mg

    marilyn monroe is extremely hot

Popular reviews

  • The Queen's Gambit

    The Queen's Gambit


    atj in IMMACULATE clothes facing struggles that are like WHATEVER because every man exists SOLELY to be destroyed and then fall in love with her??? you better believe this emotionally constipated nerd is unrepentantly the center of the universe and i was THRILLED to follow her extremely simple predictable and visually delicious story. this is yu-gi-oh for messy bitches. i spent hundreds of dollars on clothes and vodka while slamming this series into my eyeballs this week AND refilled my adderall prescription. this shit was made for me!

  • Poltergeist



    i know this is directed by spielberg because tobe hooper would NEVER have denied me a full runtime of the pure batshit insane and delightful content that we’re cockteased by in the latter part of this film. knowing how many kids this scarred does make me feel better about it though. i know children have soft brains but mine is hard now and i want those sexy practical effects to tenderize it