Favorite films

  • Dazed and Confused
  • Starship Troopers
  • No Country for Old Men
  • Die Hard

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  • M3GAN

    ★★★

  • Top Gun: Maverick

    ★★★★

  • Don't Worry Darling

    ★★

  • White Noise

    ★★½

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  • M3GAN

    M3GAN

    ★★★

    What a sassy little bitch. This is way more fun than it has any right to be, and it knows exactly what audience it's panning to. Really would have appreciated the more intense R-rated cut that was sadly neutered for box office appeal, but we got something amusing here regardless. They will make like 400 of these. Guaranteed.

  • Don't Worry Darling

    Don't Worry Darling

    ★★

    Trite, toothless and telegraphs a big gee-whiz twist from the first five minutes. In many ways, the script strains and contorts itself into some vague attempt at an Atlas Shrigged-via-The Thirteenth Floor analogue, yet Wilde's directorial decisions end up with something that plays out like an AMC reboot of The Twilight Zone. When your premiere and press tour drama is more engaging and plot-driven than your film, that's uhhh... not good.

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  • Top Gun: Maverick

    Top Gun: Maverick

    ★★★★

    HOLD UP. This young mf's name is BRADLEY BRADSHAW? And he's pissed at Tom Cruise instead of Meg Ryan? Damn son.

  • White Noise

    White Noise

    ★★½

    It was always going to be a tall order in adapting a prescient postmodern text for the screen but this was too diffuse and disjointed to really click with DeLillo's grand vision. Amusing in parts while muddled in the rest, it ultimately loses the novel's uneasy tension and heightened sense of thanatopic ambiguity. For a film about the contagion of mood, White Noise mostly plays into the abyss of meaning, desperately trying to bridge the yawning gulf of its own purposelessness.

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  • A Cinderella Story

    A Cinderella Story

    ★★★

    *types out LOL on a mid-00s-era flip phone*

    Hilary Duff: "Laugh out loud."

    I C O N I C

  • The Fast and the Furious

    The Fast and the Furious

    ★★★

    Is there anything that more embodies that turn of the millenium, post-Y2K triumph of The Year of Our Lord 2001 than a bunch of steamy-eyed, muscle-bound rev-heads cruising around in suped-up Honda Civics, listening to Ja Rule, drinking Coronas and trying to get that all-time, life-changing score of DVD players?