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  • Deadly Manor

    Deadly Manor

    Takes over an hour before anyone even dies in this damn manor smh

  • Veerana

    Veerana

    ★★★

    A totally off the rails Ramsay Brothers Excorsist-sploitation loaded with proscenium fight scenes, unholy underground lairs, metatextual jabs at horror film directors, prosthetic monster makeup, dance numbers, spooky smash zooms, fly Bollywood New Wave fashions, and hyperedited fiend club money shots again and again until they exhaust. Cut about an hour out of this relentless crowd pleaser, and it would slay! Too much movie for one movie!

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  • Suspiria

    Suspiria

    ★★★

    Took me half a week to finally log a review for this remake 'cause it's so exhausting. Luca G's Suspiria is kind of a mess that tries to do way too much without really hitting any mark over a bloated span of nearly three hours. I dug the oppressive cold restrained vibe and authentic feeling '70s aesthetic from the fashions to striking locations to the camerawork full of zooms and sustained takes. Most of the movie nails a sort of…

  • Cats

    Cats

    Nothing prepared me for the amount of high key horniness in Cats the movie. Furballs high on nip rub against each other and purr. Dancing felines almost kiss each other on their human mouths but break away at the last second because the tension builds too hot and strong. The Jason Derulo cat nearly sucks on a foot covered in CGI hair. The Taylor Swift cat sings about banging the criminal mastermind Idris Elba cat who wears a fedora and…