Favorite films

  • No Country for Old Men
  • The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie
  • The Green Mile
  • Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me

Recent activity

  • The Cloverfield Paradox


  • Open Season: Scared Silly


  • Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead


  • Stuart Little 2


Pinned reviews

  • Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me

    Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me


    “If you've got a time machine, why don't you just go back and kill Austin Powers when he's sitting on the crapper or something?”
    ”How about no, Scott. Okay?”

    I’ve never rated anything more unironically in my life.

  • We Need to Talk About Kevin

    We Need to Talk About Kevin


    Ok yes, the kid is practically the spawn of satan. But, if you walk in on your kid jerkin it and you make prolonged eye contact instead of immediately closing the door, there’s blame on both sides.

Recent reviews

  • The Green Mile

    The Green Mile


    “Why, they's angels. Angels, just like up in heaven.”

    I finally read the book before watching this time and lemme tell you, this is a faithful ass adaptation. I always knew this was well made, but having read the book first makes you realize just how well made it really is. I genuinely don’t think this could have been put to screen any better.

    Fuckin 6/5

  • Shazam! Fury of the Gods

    Shazam! Fury of the Gods

    As a baseball fan, hearing ‘Freddy Freeman’ every 5 minutes is super off-putting.

    Movie is booty cheeks

Popular reviews

  • The Truman Show

    The Truman Show


    “In case I don’t see ya, good afternoon, good evening and goodnight.”

    When I was a senior in high school, I was one of the morning announcement guys. Every morning my sign off was that quote, in the hopes that when anyone from my school watched this movie, they would hear that quote and go
    “🙄 *scoff* the morning announcement guy.”

    If that has happened even once, it was a success.

  • Donnie Brasco

    Donnie Brasco


    “Donnie, you know, sometimes I think in that orphanage they dropped you on your fuckin’ head.”

    One of my new favorite scenes in movie history is Tim Blake Nelson, Paul Giamatti and Johnny Depp sitting in a circle talking about the many meanings of ‘fuhgettaboutit’.