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  • Beanpole

    Beanpole

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Partly a movie about character censuring in exchanges with people who aren't like your best friend. And is also (supposedly) to be about the pressures of the main character's placements in the story, shuddering anxiety (through Iya, her postconcussion symptoms) & desire to refill her ties to love (through Masha) and how nothing exactly mixes up.
    A drama so remote and incomplete...a contrived dead end is made so then the erotic undertone between the two main girls could maybe finally vibrate…

  • The Turning

    The Turning

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Hereditary psychic transmissions sent from arty mama or the house has gotten this governess so paranoid that it makes her doubt the sanity in her own bloodline?
    If the former, that'd remove the accountability that the house (and the perverted old ghost) had in the story and reduce the terror to the fears of this newcomer... or maybe the haunted mom was the way to finally nail her to submission at the end? "Its broken, like you are..."

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  • Disaster Movie

    Disaster Movie

    ½

    This feels like a movie from The Asylum.....in a god-awful way.

    The production value is disgusting to look at.

    The special effects are piss-poor.

    The acting is piss-poor.

    The costume designs are terrible.

    Everything about this movie is terrible!

    Can someone please lobotomize these filmmakers?

  • Sex Tape

    Sex Tape

    ½

    I thought that "The Cloud" had a privacy policy, you know, to avoid the stupid shit that occurs in this movie; just a suggestion, writers.
    Not only is Sex Tape the worst Apple commercial ever, but it is also one of the worst movies of the year. It is truly a cynical and idiotic exercise.

    In this deeply tedious picture, Cameron Diaz and Jason Segel get off their lazy, rich asses and fail to resurrect their sex life as their…