Now that Hollywood is casting black actors in black roles, indigenous actors in indigenous roles, trans actors in trans roles, etc., how about casting bald, overweight Dutch actors in bald, overweight Dutch roles? I never thought I’d say this, but Tom Hanks is LAUGHABLY BAD here. Every time he came on screen (which is A LOT) I felt embarrassed for the guy. And the decision to tell this story from his perspective essentially turns what could have been a triumphant…
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Slash/Back 2022
(or, Attack the Coastal Hamlet)
I’ve shot a lot of goofy horror shorts with kids, and let me tell you, trying to coerce a performance from them that matches the one in my head can be an exhausting ordeal. When we first started, I’d shoot take after take of them repeating the same line until I was satisfied with the delivery. They’d whine and complain, but I’d put the squeeze on and at the very least get something serviceable.
It…
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The Wolf of Snow Hollow 2020
When I was a kid, my dad represented a man accused of multiple murders, and when he was acquitted of the crimes, as a show of gratitude, he took our family out to dinner at Bonanza Steakhouse. As we all sat there eating, I kept staring over at the man, wondering if he was capable of such atrocious acts. At one point, he busted me, looked up from his plate and met my gaze. He set his silverware down and…
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Paranormal Activity: Next of Kin 2021
Boy, people in horror movies do some pretty stupid shit. And this month, I’ve seen a whole lotta people do a whole lotta stupid shit. But whether they were searching the sewers for a rat god or scuba diving through a haunted house, I couldn’t help but feel a little bad for the consequences those people suffered as a result of their poor choices.
These kids on the other hand…
Let me tell ya, if you decide to rappel down…