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  • Häxan

    Häxan

    ★★★★½

    Terrific adaptation of the Malleus Maleficarum, gorgeous to boot. Christensen was obviously a huge dork, but with a heart of gold: he cares about all the details of the witch-hunters' manual, but also about all the women (because the vast majority of victims were women) brutalized and murdered because of that manual.

  • Eyes Wide Shut

    Eyes Wide Shut

    ★★★★★

    Seeing this movie for the first time when I've already got Stage IV Epstein Brain is quite the fucking experience, let me tell you that. I knew going into it that the orgy scene would just be sex nerd stuff, and about as shocking as the orgy scene in It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia; but WHEW, the rest.

    On a recent-ish episode of Chapo Trap House, they said that this film is best understood as a bone-dry comedy, and I'd…

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  • Chernobyl

    Chernobyl

    ★★★★½

    Great, grim, gripping stuff. The way it presents how the catastrophe happened, and how it explains the nitty-gritty nuclear physics stuff, is really detailed, historically accurate--and, who'd have thunk it, actually interesting. Jared Harris is terrific, as usual, as Valery Legasov, one of the chief scientific investigators on the Soviet commission convened to manage the disaster; and so is is Stellan Skarsgård, as Boris Shcherbina, deputy chairman of the Council of Ministers and placed in charge of crisis management.

    A…

  • Star Wars: The Last Jedi

    Star Wars: The Last Jedi

    ★★★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    I thought it ruled, first off. I thought it was fun, beautifully shot, entertaining from start to finish. It was densely packed, plot-wise, but I thought it moved things along really well. It seems to me that most of the people who disliked it or were lukewarm (haha! get it?!) to it are turbo-nerds who suck and who don't enjoy anything for itself, but who just want everything explained to them every second and for it to fit their pre-determined…