Friday the 13th Part III

Friday the 13th Part III ★★

Part III is not a good movie. Some people actually cite the characters in Part III as the best of the series thus far. Those people are dead wrong.

The characters are almost all supremely annoying. Their relationships are annoying, the things they say and do are annoying. The bickering couple who run the grocery store are horrible. The three-person "biker gang" makes me want to stab myself in the eyes with a pitchfork.

The group of kids on vacation are so fucking annoying, it's no wonder Jason is so determined to cut them down. One dude is just basically pressuring his girl for sex the entire time and generally acting like a complete douche. Another dipshit thinks hitting girls in the face with a yo-yo is funny.

Some people like Larry Zerner as Andy, who tries to cover his painful insecurity by playing ill-conceived practical jokes, but I'm not one. Vera was alright. She probably didn't deserve to die...

I mean, to me, it's not a good horror movie when you can barely muster the sympathy needed to care about your fellow human beings getting ruthlessly slaughtered by a disfigured maniac. I feel like this movie cemented a trend in American horror cinema to just populate your film with aggravating assholes, in order to let the audience off the hook, morally, and allow them to enjoy the stunt kills as a sort of slapstick comedy show, and let them root for the villain instead of the victims.

Once again (as in Part 2) the film does get a lot better once the pursuit of the final girl kicks in. Jason is physically very menacing, and it is nice to see him get his mask. The last section of the movie contains some genuine thrills.

The worst thing about Part III is the deeply unfortunate 3D camera gimmicks that crop up every few minutes. I don't know what they were thinking. Almost none of the 3D has anything to do with the movie. It's just people sticking random objects into the camera for way too long each time.

The bottom line is that Friday the 13 Part III is something I cannot imagine enjoying on its own-- it's only worth watching as a stepping stone in between Part 2 and The Final Chapter.

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