Pruning this blog before it goes to seed.

Favorite films

  • Systems Research
  • Where Is the Friend's House?
  • After Last Season
  • Tender Mercies

Recent activity

  • Peter Pan


  • Barbie

  • Ponyo


  • Ponyo


Pinned reviews

  • The Black Cat

    The Black Cat


    You should always trust the dreams you have during a psychic bubble witch movie set apocalypse. These colors don't run, except they do. Green scuzzfuck witch slime from mouth to mouth, open wide and eat my witch puke. Levana's murder set pieces in rainbow black darklight. Let me tell you about baby. Baby is perfectly sedate. baby knows it's fate. My baby is a witch boy. Actress, Model, Dancer - these are the desired occupations of a sleeping witch, of a third mother. And with more glowy maternal confusion, a trilogy is closed. Fuck the Mother of Tears. Cozzi got it a right.

  • Messiah of Evil

    Messiah of Evil


    Velvet Vampire goes Pop Shopping. Too drunk on red vodka cocktails to know it's a zombie movie. What's a zombie movie? figures in the landscape, where the beach is one endless oil painting and Dad's paint cool murals all over the beach house walls. This movie is made out of cinnabar and jade women who shop at supermarkets during the Anti-Christ apocalypse. Dawn of the Dead walking along the beach at night, holding hands with Jean Rollin.

Recent reviews

  • Peter Pan

    Peter Pan


    I feel like the world has been sleeping on this insaniac digital Bava colored vampire mermaid proto hyperpop Speed Racer version of Peter Pan. It's possibly the only decent rendition of the fairy tale considering that Hook is more of a sequel and is marred by Julia Roberts. Some images from the film feel like they were taken directly from Greg Hildebrandt's illustrations from a book I had as a kid where every character was gilded in bright colors. Far more affecting and comprehensive than a Peter Pan movie has a right to be and it will also bless you with a visual assault.

  • Lords of the Deep

    Lords of the Deep


    One of the defining films of my letterboxdless ocean summer. I know that Lords of the Deep is somehow a rip-off of The Abyss which was made congruently. The quote I read made it seem like Roger Corman was annoyed that his former assistant was making it so he beat him to the punch with Lords of the Deep. I guess it's possible James Cameron got the basic idea from Corman first? I wish I knew, but I've always had…

Popular reviews

  • I Know What You Did Last Summer

    I Know What You Did Last Summer


    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    I've seen this movie many times but not until this most recent viewing did I realize that Sarah Michelle Gellar is a beam of light, like a sunflower, an angel, a Precious Moment. A perfume counter girl with high-waisted denim shorts and cigarette affixed silver fingernails. Her chase scene is poetry in motion. The death of a beauty queen, tragic like an Opera. She runs and she runs. She breaks glass, she crawls out of a car window belly down,…

  • Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown

    Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown


    This was my introduction to Almodovar and is my forever favorite.

    When I first saw this film I would soon be entering the last echelon of my marriage. I didn't know it at the time but soon he would cheat, and I would catch him. I would have what I later realized was a nervous breakdown, and I would quit my job, digging us even deeper into poverty. I would lose forty pounds because I couldn't afford drugs or alcohol…