Holy Motors

Holy Motors ★★★★½

"3! 12! Shit!" - Monsieur Oscar ( L'accordéoniste)

CHIMPANZEES. TALKING LIMOS. WEIRD KEYS FOR FINGERS. ACCORDIONS. MOTION-CAPTURE LOVE-MAKING. ALIEN-DEMON PENETRATION. MONSIEUR MERDE'S ERECTION. MONSIEUR MERDE EATING MONEY. MONSIEUR MERDE EATING FLOWERS. ADVERTS FOR WEBSITES THAT ARE ACTUALLY GRAVESTONES. HOMELESS PEOPLE SHUFFLING THROUGH SEWERS. EVA MENDES' CAT-WALKING. BITTEN-OFF FINGERS. ARM-PIT LICKING. "WEIRD, WEIRD...HE'S SOOOO WEIRD!" OLD BEGGAR WOMEN. MARVELLOUS MOTION-CAPTURE ACROBATICS. SUICIDE PACTS. MULTIPLE MURDERS THAT COULD BE SUICIDES. MASKS. BARBED-WIRE MASKS. "AIM FOR THE CROTCH!" MASSIVE DOGS. MUSICAL NUMBERS. ALLUSIONS TO JIM MORRISON AND HIS MAUSOLEUM. NIGHT-VISION. PIGEONS. OH YEAH, DID I MENTION CHIMPANZEES? AND MONSIEUR MERDE?

What the hell did I just watch?

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