Teddy has written 13 reviews for films rated ★★ .

  • Spider-Man: Far from Home

    Spider-Man: Far from Home


    Spider-Man Marathon - Movie #7

    Oh dear... oh dear...
    I really forgot how many things frustrated me about this, character development is completely nonexistent, themes are thrown out the window for the sake of a quippy MCU joke and lacks any of the responsibility that Peter Parker embodies throughout the source material where this film is "constructed" from.

    Honestly, all that this marathon has done for me thus far is make me feel self-conscious about my love life...

  • The Amazing Spider-Man 2

    The Amazing Spider-Man 2


    Spider-Man Marathon - Movie #5

    I hate how much potential was wasted. It literally has no idea what it wants to be or what is should be and I don't know if I can ever forgive it for that...
    *sponsored by Sony*

  • Spider-Man 3

    Spider-Man 3


    Spider-Man Marathon - Movie #3

    Ngl haven't actually sat down to put myself through this before... I wanna go to bed.

  • The Hunger Games

    The Hunger Games


    K my friends singing Into The Unknown while Katniss was getting a knife held to her throat was probably the funniest thing I've seen in a while...
    But seriously this movie suuuuucks. Enjoyable, yeah sure. Well-paced, strangely yes. Unpredictable and well thought out, flippppp noooooo.
    I can tell the book has elements that would create some interesting subject matter and retrospective ideas but the film has no way of transmitting those over whatsoever. The music is completely overbearing, the effects…

  • Zombieland



    Seriously I just can't understand why people enjoy this so much. There is absolutely no subtlety in the script to the point of it being a tonal mess. It has no clue what it wants to be in the process of depicting emotion or when to do it.
    I'm really sorry that I don't feel the same as everyone else on this. If I had to describe this in one word it would be 'artificial', nothing feels real, earned or…

  • Midway



    Forgot to log this because I only saw like 10 minutes of it. But seriously this just looked like a cutscene from battlefield 1.
    So maybe take this rating as for the VFX rather than the movie itself...

  • The Edge of Democracy

    The Edge of Democracy


    Politics: poly meaning many and tics meaning bloodsucking leeches

  • Charlie's Angels

    Charlie's Angels


    I only watched the first and last 20 minutes so my opinion shouldn't mean much, but seriously, this is some of the most average cinema I've seen...

  • Between Two Ferns: The Movie

    Between Two Ferns: The Movie


    If "the office" had an unfunny, narcissistic, braindead cousin it would be this...

  • G.I. Jane

    G.I. Jane


    Oh my... oh my
    Only saw the last hour and thank goodness I didn't see the first...
    I get it if you liked this but this was just not enough for me to take this seriously

  • Alone



    This was my first short film so I have to give myself some credit... but this is still pretty bad.
    I will actually say that the concept of this is actually pretty okay. But on almost every other level it is really not the best.
    Cinematography is something I focus on a lot now, but this is just whatever shot was the easiest to get.
    And even though I don't like this it's absolutely incredible to see where you came from over a year ago, what you've learned, what you've thought, and where you wanted to go... and that is why I can still appreciate this.

  • Shakespeare Retold: A Midsummer Night's Dream

    Shakespeare Retold: A Midsummer Night's Dream


    I had to watch this for a school project... and yeah I'm glad I get credit for this