Your Name. ★★★★★

2016: Ranked!
Makoto Shinkai: Ranked!
FUCK BBC: My Top 100 of the 21st
My 日本 Canon

- Once in a while, when I wake up, I find myself crying.
- The dream I must have had, I can never recall. But...
- But... the sensation that I've lost something lingers for a long time after I wake up.
- I'm always searching... for something, for someone.
- This feeling has possessed me, I think, from that day...
- That day when the stars came falling. It was almost as if...
- ... as if a scene from a dream. Nothing more, nothing less...


than a beautiful view.

★★★★★★★★★★

I am a lonely person. I think lately it has been a little harder, 'cause I'm not in college anymore where I'd constantly see my friends, and I'd still go there everyday just to see them if it wasn't in another town and didn't cost me an eye to go. When I see pictures of my college friends having fun somewhere that I cannot be, I get very sad. Every day I message someone begging for something to do. When I can't find anything, my distant friends are here for me. People I've met online, from another city, another state, another country... They have always been here for me, since I was 11. Today, you, reading this review and thinking "when is this melodramatic cunt's gonna talk about the film", is one of those people. To read a review from people I follow, and talk to them in the comments, is some level of company. To have someone read a review of mine, like it, comment about the film with me, is some level of company.

I had two specific online friends that marked me forever. One of them I never found out her full name, so not being able to find her these days is kinda on me, but I haven't given up trying. The other was someone I met in 2008, and I deeply cherished her. I still do. We'd talk every day, sometimes all day. We understood each other so well, it was almost as we were the same person. She was that one person that I connected the most, the one person that I could be completely open with, that one person I wouldn't stop thinking about. In 2009, I had some sort of convulsion, out of the blue; one minute I was lying on the edge of my bed, talking to my cousin, suddenly I was down in the floor, unable to move or say anything. I had no idea what was happening. My aunt was crying, desperate, thinking I was dying. For a moment there, I thought so too. At this moment, I could only think of one thing.

Her.

How can two people who've never met in person, care for each other so much? I think that, to feel something for another person, to love, and to be loved back... is the single greatest achievement that we can strive for. Moulin Rouge was right. Your Name show us a Tokyo boy and a country girl who fall in love with each other by living each other's lifes. When they sleep, they wake up with switched bodies, and they communicate by keeping a journal on their phones. I think all of Makoto Shinkai's work has led up to this. This is his masterpiece. The concepts he's shown on his previous films, he explores to a much greater scale with this one. All those feelings that I have for my distant friend came overflowing with this movie, from a certain point on I couldn't stop crying until it ended. The characters themselves communicated deeply with me; a quiet boy getting in touch with his feminine side, a shy girl getting in touch with her masculine side. Then, their restless search for one another. The despair when you're not able to contact a loved one so far away. The fear for the worst. Everything came up. And I cried, to the very end.

This is how this film had me feeling. There's a bit more, but I don't wanna spoil it for you, so I'm gonna end it here. I'll talk about all the technical aspects in a less personal review when I rewatch it, but for now this is it.

Thank you, Makoto Shinkai.

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