eli roth literally just gets it, this rules, so much fun - funny & gross & fucked up. i miss seeing this kind of a movie at the multiplex all the time!!!
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Hostel 2005
the fetid grime of gay panic & misogyny smeared all over every minute of this.. so malevolent... pray tell, what horrors lurk in eli roth's exceedingly juvenile & heterosexually insecure mind? let us count the ways! i used to think the sequel was better cuz it seems less bro-y by virtue of centering female protagonists but with age comes wisdom and i can confirm at this time that i no longer believe either of those things to be true. hostel is a…
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Hollywood Vampyr 2002
i could see HOLLYWOOD VAMPYR appealing to some libertarian dork who rly believes in his heart and soul that goths are an actively oppressed social class in society lol its amazing. there should def be more movies for this demographic of ppl imo. this shit is sooo pretentious. goth oppression is real! theres a whole makeover sequence where a goth fuad ramses ass bitch dyes his head hair silver, pencils in his dumbass face hair, and puts on bad boy…
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Carving Magic 1959
god.. you fucking loser... you moron.... you simpleton!!!!!! youre so ludicrously bad at carving meat its patently EMBARRASSING. you should be ASHAMED of your meat slicing abilities. u actually deserve every single bit of mockery and derision u hear in my cruel chuckles and chortles, you hideous, beastly FOOL!!!!!!!
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The Descent: Part 2 2009
i gotta get this outta the way the descent is obviously the superior film: it's scarier, it's artful in a way this is not, it carries more emotional weight, and it's an all around smarter movie but frankly to be frank when it comes down to it, it does NOT have a pool of shit the creatures defecate into. like they have some guy in full creature drag (nude except for his snout & ears, oily grey skin, and deformities) squatting…
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I Blame Society 2020
it's dope when someone makes something out of nothing with no real $$money$$ buuuut neither the horror nor comedic elements ever come together. i could be off base but my gut feeling is someone wanted to make a horror movie cuz it’s the cheapest & most interesting no budget movie a filmmaker can make that other people will actually watch?? but i blame society comes across as a project without an interest in horror as a genre; the rhythm is off,…
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Simpson Street 1979
after opening with a history lesson explaining how a south bronx community slowly turned into a ghetto thru the construction of the long island expressway, subsequent white flight, and redlining, simpson street transitions into looser ethnographic documentary about the people of the neighborhood as it was in the late '70s & the tangible impact of discrimination on their lives. a very honest portrait of humanity, alternating serious & affecting moments with light & touching ones. "this is what's left of my hobby. my…
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No Stopping the Stover 2016
wow cant believe john waters featured prominently dead center on the dvd-r cover image didnt show up to an interview for the george stover documentary... u know who did? fred olen ray, who does a mildly amusing mostly unfunny bit that doesnt land at all. not a criticism, its actually perfect. charming doc, v cute, loved it
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Billy Madison 1995
as someone who grew up in the 90s with an older brother who loved the sandman, inadvertently passing a love of sandmantics on to me ive seen this precisely one million times maybe even more but i gotta say revisiting this as an adult of indeterminate age........ this is a dark film. very dark. odd film, quite disturbing! (i am unwell.) this man is not technically cognitively impaired but his little prince syndrome has caused such horrific arrested development he…
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Girls for Rent 1974
georgina spelvin rapes a (willing & eager) retarded man and if that's not enough to get yr blood pumping, in a truly stunning fit of mental derangement she proceeds to shoot him in the head while he's still inside her. so yknow, girls for rent?? pretty good! the quick, leering close up shots on tits made me laugh out loud multiple times. im so glad theres so much demented sex sleaze dripping with pure lechery ive never even seen!
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A Corpse for Christmas 2023
they fuckin (on) corpses..... real scummy! love a walk thru pa dutch xmas traditions and a literal walk thru a christmas garden that includes ninja turtles making pizza?? why the hell not! a real delight
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Infinity Pool 2023
boring, empty posturing at a point or a politic. whatttt yr saying obscene wealth is a pipeline that leads directly to crass moral & spiritual bankruptcy? no shit dumbass! over-calculated & affected thematic depth. trying to say something of value without actually saying something of value is criminal, to me. looks p decent visually which is my lone compliment tho it doesnt even go anywhere with that cuz it remains intellectually lazy with every idea it tries to explore. one tedious display of debauched violence after another. dull. not for moi i guess!
