John Cribbs

Everybody on here seems to be watching much classier movies than I am.

Favorite films

  • Pierrot le Fou
  • Head
  • Saint Jack
  • Get Carter

Recent activity

All
  • Miller's Crossing

  • Iké Boys

  • Femme Fatale

  • Tempest

Recent reviews

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  • The Menu

    The Menu

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    I'd have given the movie five stars if we could have seen Anya Taylor-Joy just house that entire burger.

  • Orphan: First Kill

    Orphan: First Kill

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Expected this to be STEPFATHER 2 to ORPHAN's STEPFATHER: treading familiar territory to lesser but not unrewarding returns. That's more or less the vibe for the first half, until the movie introduces a twist that alters the concept to "Esther finds herself in the middle of a V.C. Andrews story." Multiple maniacs are always better than one, and the turn affords some satisfying psycho biddy and gothic elements that are more interesting than the "miniature Hannibal Lector" opening, but the…

Popular reviews

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  • Candyman

    Candyman

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Half Jordan Peele thesis paper, half mess.

    I know we're supposed to call this "Nia DaCosta's CANDYMAN," but it shares with Peele's other movies a social statement that's somehow both glaringly obvious and fundamentally incoherent. The movie can't resist connecting #SayHisName to the basic concept of naming the hook-handed mirror ghost to bring him forward, but who is this version of the monster supposed to be punishing? Cops? Teenagers who take selfies? Successful black couples who try to pretend they…

  • Total Recall

    Total Recall

    In his science fiction films, Verhoeven is on a perpetual search for the human soul. In ROBOCOP, he went about unearthing the humanity encased inside machine; in HOLLOW MAN, he divorced body and mind to see if consciousness remained (it didn't.) With TOTAL RECALL he presented himself with a real challenge: to discover the soul of Arnold Schwarzenegger. A typically distracted blue collar bloke, driven by the obscure desire to escape his earthly confines and unfulfilled existence to become somebody…