The Graduate

The Graduate ★★★★★

My fourth watch.
This is gonna be a long one and a bit personal, just so anyone who wants to steer clear of emotional shit can do so. Also, this review will seem really sad and maybe sappy or unnecessarily complainy. But I have some shit to say, so here we are. Continue at your own risk.

It's impossible to overstate this film's impact on me. There's something about it that truly resonates with me, whether it be the humor, the melancholy mood, or the brilliant editing, dialogue, acting, soundtrack, and I could go on. For me, I feel Ben's experiences every time. I'll get into this more in a minute, but I want to emphasize that I believe that this is one of the greatest pieces of art ever conceived and is a perfect film on every level. I just want to put that out there. I rewatched it today because of that.

Ever since elementary school, I've felt sort of cursed when it comes to love (already it sounds overly dramatic...we're off to a good start). I've always been a big nerd and was never very popular. I liked a few girls in elementary school, one of whom I was close friends with despite (or perhaps because of) the fact that I'd told her, but we were never more than friends. In middle school, I was rejected once again. As I entered high school, though, a friend and I began to like each other. We were together, and then apart, and then together again, and "split up" (if you can call the end of a ninth grade relationship "splitting up"). I won't get too into the specifics, but she and I really hurt each other on an emotional level and it left a huge impact on my attitude towards love and life. Not only did I feel that I was cursed to fail in terms of love, but the heartache I felt also left me extremely stunted emotionally and for a long time afterward I didn't really let out any emotions.

Throughout this all was film. I already loved film and The Graduate at this point in my life, but its themes of hopelessness and failure and isolation resonated with me more and more upon each watch. I love this movie wholeheartedly because it helped me understand my emotions and my worldview in a beautiful and powerful way.

If you've read some of my reviews recently, you may know that I've been having a rough eleventh grade year. It's been just about the worst few months of my life and I've been deeply depressed for much of it, despite that I have the best friends right now than ever before in my life. But, in the midst of that darkness, I began to feel something I hadn't been able to feel for a long time: I have begun to like a girl. This probably isn't a big deal to most people, but it's really important to me right now. It's so refreshing because for the first time in a long time, I can enjoy the feeling of some semblance of hope and love, and I know that if The Graduate had anything to do with it, I am forever indebted to this film. It truly is perfection.

EDIT (2/2/2021): Haven't thought about this review in awhile, but I don't really like parts of it. Feels too self-pitying, which is obviously part of both depression and loneliness. Or maybe it's how weird the situation with this girl got, idk. Just glad I'm past this point. Ight bye.

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