Eternals ★★★½

The Eternals, ranked from least ridiculous name to most ridiculous name:

Gilgamesh- He’s Gilgamesh. Checks out. No notes.

Phastos- The back half of Hephaestus. Sure, that works.

Makkari- Sounds like a tech startup

Thena- If you remove a letter from your mythology-inspired character’s name, that’s Good Writing

Ikaris- Completely neutral name. Neither good nor bad. He isn’t really that much like Icarus, but he’s also not totally unlike Icarus.

Sersi- Fine. Whatever. Perfectly decent name.

Druig- One letter away from “drug.” Sounds like “droog.” Barry Keoghan is one of our best character actors, he deserves a better name than this.

Kingo- you already know all about Kingo

Sprite- Product placement has gone too far

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