Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker ★½

Imagine this:

IF: The Mandalorian is your perfect dream vacation where millions of lifetime memories are made.

Then: The Rise of Skywalker is 300 straight hours of watching Barney and The Teletubbies. Or, Hell on Earth.

Episode VII- Gave us an introduction to new characters. It wanted us to care, and a lot were left wanting more. Especially, due to the final scene. 

Episode VIII- Brought back a lot of familiar faces. Unfortunately, Luke was made into a meme of himself, and a lot of the film was uneven. There was still hope. There’s only 2 strikes, and maybe JJ could bring closure with the final film.

Episode IX- Oops, JJ drops the ball. I didn’t care about our new heroes. Our old friends are either dead, or too tired to give commanding performances. Rey heals more people than Jesus, and there’s way too many fake outs when it comes to big Star Wars moments. You honestly don’t believe what you’re watching. The entire film is an absolute hot mess. My favorite part was the end, because I knew I didn’t have to stay for a final credits scene. I honestly probably would’ve enjoyed Cats more. IX is a cure for insomnia. An extremely poor execution by JJ. Actors acting just for a paycheck, with zero emotion in their acting.  

Enough of this: Bring me Episode 8 of The Mandalorian. Baby Yoda needs our help.

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Todd Gaines liked these reviews