The Slumber Party Massacre ★★★

The Russ is loose and looking for some mother fuckers to kill. Bye-bye parents. Mr. Contant's styling and profiling hair. Your last ladder. PowerFUCKIN'tools. Basketball. Showers after basketball. Locker room chit-chat. Valerie drinks too much milk. Locked in and fucked. A missing pussy. Awesome-as-fuck piano music. Fuckin' spooked. The misfit little sister. Sweet bicycles. Weekends were made for Michelob and Maui Wowie. Red Kool-Aid. Girls look at Playgirl? A pajama party peep-show. Death to snails. Fuckin' Boo Boo. Missing fuses. A very dull knife. The Brooke Shields look. Bye-bye head. Brave-horny-teenage-boys-who-try-like-a-mother-fucker-to-survive-the-night. The slice of pizza you never thought would get eaten. Death in a trunk. An extreme reaction. Guess who's coming through the window? Teen drinking is very bad. A tick-tock clock. Lighting crashes. Coach knows baseball. Fuckin' extension cords. Hack-a-hand. The last hurrah. A super-fun ultra-campy hilarious-as-fuck slasher that shouldn't be as entertaining as it is. If only John fuckin' Carpenter directed and Tom fuckin' Savini did the special effects, this film would be a mother fucking classic.