Happy Together ★★★★★

// let's start over //
// sometimes i think the ears are even more important than the eyes. many times, listening is better than seeing //
// i heard there's a lighthouse. heartbroken people go there, to leave their sorrows at the lighthouse //
// perhaps it's because we were so close.. but when i embraced him, all i could hear was my own heartbeat //

film club weekly pick #20

(film club weekly picks - ranked)

(part of my films i've written poetry for list)

(part of my pinned reviews list)

(wong kar-wai - ranked)

one of the most beautiful, tragic, emotionally harrowing pieces of work i've ever seen. peeling back your skin and leaving you aching and raw. this film is rivetingly wounded, deeply volatile, and sharply observant. i've never seen a relationship portrayed in this manner. this is a really important film. happy together burned me to my core, searing into me like a brand on my soul. there's nothing left but ashes. sometimes the wrong kind of love can engulf anything in its path, can scald so painfully that you don't know where your heart is anymore, because it has melted in with the rest of the molten lava. i've been there before. singed on the side of a cliff, teetering on the edge. always pulled back from the brink and tossed back into the same cycle with the same person, like the choppy waves of the sea swimming underneath a storm. sometimes you can confuse a sickening toxicity with the eruption of love. but isn't it all a volcano, just the same?

the cinematography is some of the most gorgeous i've ever seen. those upside down shots (and of course all the sun flare) were especially innovative. the acting is truly exceptional. the sometimes mismatched pattern of storytelling is effective and interesting. the runtime is the blink of an eye. this is an instant favorite of mine, for sure. wong kar-wai has stolen my heart twice in one week, and he is likely to become one of my all-time favorite directors. he has a magnificent, singular vision in each of the films i've seen that has been compelling, well thought out, provocative, unique and alluring. he's truly a brilliant filmmaker; the growth between chungking express and this film is evident. a three year span of time bloomed entire gardens of profound wisdom and the vast capability of resonance. i'm angry at myself for taking this long to begin his filmography. i feel that this film has transformed my life. i can't wait for in the mood for love next. and of course, you know this film demands poetry, and who am i to say no to that?

a fight, in the night.
indigo midnight skies
soft sobbing cries
accusing him of lies
he hates me
and i wonder why
he loves me
and i want to die
he paints me 
and i want to try
he taints me
and i'm no longer mine

brush strokes and
flush notes
he's artwork
and i'm without hope
he's mesmerizing
and i'm cigarette smoke;
choke.
choke on my words
choke on my tongue
choke on my verbs
choke on my lungs
choke on my iloveyous
choke on my imsorrys
choke on my half truths
choke on my nights of starry

trying to go back
to where i've come
when you've traveled
to the end of the world
how do you
recognize home?
he's gone,
the worst has come,
come to pass.
liquid ash
rust spots muddy
the shiny brass
empty glass
air's a feather pass
no more hollow, follow
shallow overpass

lava erupts
inside my heart
i'm not sure
where you stop 
and where i start
i'm not sure
where you stop
and where i part
the falls are waiting
for us to fall apart

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