• Saw VI

    Saw VI

    ★★★★

    t̲h̲e̲ ̲c̲h̲o̲i̲c̲e̲ ̲i̲s̲ ̲y̲o̲u̲r̲s̲ ̲

    so i forgot to mention yesterday that the girl i’ve been seeing & crushing on surprised me with a new Saw t shirt—like whoa—no one’s ever been that nice to me especially with a horror series i hold dearly to my heart. i’m usually the one buying gifts for people but this was a complete shocker omg. she even got the one with john kramer on it instead of billy. she’s never seen the movies but…

  • Saw V

    Saw V

    ★★★

    l̲e̲t̲ ̲t̲h̲e̲ ̲g̲a̲m̲e̲s̲ ̲b̲e̲g̲i̲n̲

    Many people do not like this installment at all and like I stated before I totally understand why. It’s one of my least favorites as well.

    however—if Saw V committed a murder and was on the run from the law, I would give him a place to hide and feed em cuz in this house we support all of Saw...even the delinquent entries. sorry V...i say this with love.

  • Logan

    Logan

    ★★★★★

    y̲o̲u̲ ̲s̲t̲i̲l̲l̲ ̲h̲a̲v̲e̲ ̲t̲i̲m̲e̲

    You know. Looking back through my account and reviews on here over the four years, they mainly consist as a whole of: 20% bitching 30% life stories 15% uncertainty 10% deducing films 5% being horny  20% love all equaling to a total of 100% cringe. I find most of them hard to read especially my early reviews. But ugh it shows how far I’ve come and how much I’ve change emotional and film-wise. Cause I definitely…

  • Saw IV

    Saw IV

    ★★★½

    c̲h̲e̲r̲i̲s̲h̲ ̲y̲o̲u̲r̲ ̲l̲i̲f̲e̲

    strahm: there’s another accomplice helping jigsaw and he’s a big motherfucker too cuz there’s no way kramer or amanda young could’ve packed kerry in that trap.

    hoffman *standing menacingly suspicious in the shadows looking brooding and buff as hell*: 👀

  • Saw III

    Saw III

    ★★★★

    i̲ ̲f̲o̲r̲g̲i̲v̲e̲ ̲y̲o̲u̲

    lionsgate: heyyy donnie-o here’s your lines for the next Saw movie. 

    *lionsgate hands donnie whalberg the script*

    donnie *reads in monotone voice*: you fucking bitch. i’ll fucking kill you. you fucking dumb punk bitch. i’ll fucking kill you. you junkie bitch. you’re not jigsaw you stupid cunt fucking bitch. you fucking bitch. i’ll fucking kill you. fuck you bitch. bitch. 

    *donnie looks at lionsgate concerned*

    liongate: Oh! There’s more on the back.

    *donnie flips script over*

    donnie *sighs*: daniel! daNIELLLL!!!!’

    lionsgate: Perfect! We only have .2secs to get ready to shoot. Be ready. You good?

    *donnie just stares at lionsgate*

  • Saw II

    Saw II

    ★★★★

    d̲o̲n̲’̲t̲ ̲f̲o̲r̲g̲e̲t̲ ̲t̲h̲e̲ ̲r̲u̲l̲e̲s̲

    punky hair shawnee is my spirit bitch. I’ll never forget how frail and small she was in my arms when I hugged her like a lost cute puppy.

  • Red Eye

    Red Eye

    ★★★½

     ̲b̲a̲d̲ ̲t̲h̲i̲n̲g̲s̲ ̲h̲a̲p̲p̲e̲n̲ ̲t̲o̲ ̲g̲o̲o̲d̲ ̲p̲e̲o̲p̲l̲e̲

    Another favorite from my youth. An excellent paced thriller that is equally accelerated by our two great leads. It was weird seeing it after so many years as it was an echo of what was 2006 when I saw it. So much stuff happened then that it all rushed back to me while viewing this. I still haven’t been on a plane yet but back when I was a kid I kinda didn’t want…

  • Underworld

    Underworld

    ★★★

    i̲ ̲w̲i̲l̲l̲ ̲b̲e̲c̲o̲m̲e̲ ̲t̲h̲e̲ ̲h̲u̲n̲t̲e̲d̲

    Ngtl I’ve been one horny bitch this month. And seeing kate spreading in that leather nearly gave me a seizure. By the end of the movie I was curled around the tv begging the lord to forgive me and for selene to bite me.

  • Lost Highway

    Lost Highway

    ★★★

    i̲ ̲h̲a̲d̲ ̲a̲ ̲d̲r̲e̲a̲m̲ ̲a̲b̲o̲u̲t̲ ̲y̲o̲u̲

    It’s kinda weird to see Bill Pullman in a Lynch film. Not that it’s bad, I love him, been a fan since I was a kid but he was a particular choice. But almost in a way it fits the tone of the film as being weird in general.

    ahhhhh I need to retrospect some of this director’s work again because idk just seeing his films now with different eyes it’s almost—well inadequately confusing.…

  • Enola Holmes

    Enola Holmes

    ★★★

    l̲i̲v̲e̲ ̲t̲h̲e̲ ̲l̲i̲f̲e̲

    I wasn’t particularly excited or anticipating this. I actually just low-key forgot about it after it’s announcement. And for the most part it’s what you think it would be. I feel the whole Holmes thing is a bit overdone now and doesn’t feel there’s much life left to be injected in it. 

    My biggest worry going in was basically Millie. I quit watching Stranger Things midway through it’s atrocious second season and it’s really the only role…

  • 1BR

    1BR

    ★★★

    t͟h͟i͟s͟ ͟i͟s͟ ͟y͟o͟u͟r͟ ͟h͟o͟m͟e͟ ͟

    The main character’s choices confused me...

    She wakes up to her fire alarm and smoke rolling under her door. First thing she does: tries to slowly turn on her bed lamp—WTF! Lady your apartment is possibly on fire! Fuck that lamp get your ass out the door! 

    I actually thought this was okay. I really liked the main actress Nicole Brydon Bloom and the very dramatic score. Yes the plot is predictable as hell and kinda gives a lukewarm ending. But I’d totally be down for a sequel if they keep the same characters.

  • The Matrix Revolutions

    The Matrix Revolutions

    ★★★

    i̲ ̲c̲a̲n̲ ̲s̲e̲e̲ ̲y̲o̲u̲

    I think I should continue the theme I have of this series reviews with how my relationships was going haha but eh don’t really have much to say. I got to enjoy the other day with that one girl at my place. She really picked out some good films to watch and surprised me with wanting to play the RE games like woah *keanu’s voice* and I took her for a walk across my huge sprawling property. Found…