Before Midnight

Before Midnight

It's still there. It's still there. It's still there. It's gone...

This is the rawest of the trilogy. I have been putting off viewing this, I just do not wish to accept that this is over, that we will never get to see Jesse and Celine 9 years from now, that we will never get to ride in the car with them again, sit at the dinner table with them again, that we will never get to walk with them again.

I have been experiencing a bit of writers block, my heart and soul do not seem to be communicating very well lately. But please do know, that whenever my soul is ready to bare all in which this film made me feel, all of which this film made me long for, I will be sure to document it all and allow my every emotion to glisten.

I can pretend that all I care about is being a head strong woman, that I may one day be a beautiful woman with a nice body and an incredible career, I can pretend that i'll be okay with the continued loneliness that I have felt my entire life, I can pretend. I know I am getting older, and i'm at the stage now where if no man likes me now, then no man will most likely ever like me, it sounds pathetic, jarring, and painful, and it is painful to type these truth letters out in the open, I am just so intensely afraid no man will ever love me, or even like me, for me.

I can pretend, but what is the use in pretending when in my heart of hearts, all I have truly desired is love. I want a love that is loud and all consuming, a love that is respected and gentle, a love that provides challenges and arguments and pain, but within all that pain, there still lies the resounding sting of love.

I want a love that is irrevocably ours; whoever and wherever you may be.

''I fucked up my whole life because of the way you sing.''

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