• Things




    The Important Cinema Club Masterpiece Classics returns to the Fox Theatre on Tuesday, October 3 with a rare theatrical screening of THINGS!!! Justin Decloux and I will introduce this landmark of Canadian direct-to-video horror, and will be joined onstage by cast members from the film!!! If you live in Toronto and miss this, you will regret it for the rest of your days. Get your tickets here: www.foxtheatre.ca/movies/the-important-cinema-club-masterpiece-classics-things/

    What is THINGS??? In 1989, two friends in Scarborough, Ontario…

  • Fresh


    This is about 85% predictable/routine, and 15% I wasn’t entirely sure what was going to happen next. I’m not being paid to write this, so I really don’t think I owe you any explanation for the scientific methodology behind those numbers. I liked the actors. Serviceable streaming content.

  • Emmanuelle 3

    Emmanuelle 3

    Not saying I'm necessarily "right" to feel this way, but three movies in I took some pleasure in watching Emmanuelle and Jean finally start to struggle with polyamory. HEY FUCKERS... NOT REALLY ALL THAT EASY, IS IT?!?!?!?!

    Theme song by Serge Gainsbourg!

  • The Winslow Boy

    The Winslow Boy

    David Mamet tries his hand at British period drama, with words/phrases like “I say” and “rather” and “My dear Miss Winslow…” replacing “Fuck you!” and “You dumb fuck!” in his usual dense, rat-a-tat dialogue. This is based on an apparently true story of a boy expelled from a fancy military school for petty theft, and his family’s tireless quest to prove his innocence in court. The kid is obviously guilty, but the case caught the country’s imagination and became representative…

  • The Son

    The Son


    A long stretch of not much happening, then a devastating piece of information, then an even longer stretch of not much happening.

  • Rosetta



    It’s been a while since I watched something by les frères Dardenne, and had forgotten how visceral they can be when they’re at their best. Very grim, but unsentimental, and always in motion. Very little of the lead character’s inner life because there’s no time to waste on that - just moving, moving, moving.

  • Dreams



    Dunno why this was so coolly received when it came out. Did folks just hate beauty? Alright so it's not as good as Throne of Blood. Well, neither are you!

    Nobody... (*does a quick mental inventory of every director who ever lived*)... and I mean truly nobody was more a master of the cinematic frame than Kurosawa. Blocking, composition, all that jazz. So it's notable that so many of the compositions in this movie are... elemental. Take the "Mount Fuji…

  • Ernest Scared Stupid

    Ernest Scared Stupid

    The fourth and final Ernest movie to be distributed by Disney. I wonder if the studio demanded that there be more kid characters. It's disappointing coming so soon after Ernest Goes to Jail, a grown-up movie about grown-up problems.

    Peaks with its opening credits. The troll puppets are pretty neat, and I also like how much Ernest loves his dog. As usual, Varney gives it 110 percent, god bless him.

    It's absolutely fucked that they got some random guy to play Gailard Sartain's role. Inexcusable! If Sartain wants too much money? You pay him. If Sartain's busy? You delay your shoot.

  • Expend4bles


    I’ve never seen a more phoned-in movie. Most of the Expendables are gone, leaving only one actual star, Statham, to do much of anything. Special effects are on par with Decker vs Dracula. Almost two-thirds of the runtime takes place on one boat. I thought we were going to get a new location for Act 3, but no.

    Stallone, the spiritual godfather of the franchise, blesses us only with an extended cameo. In his absence, a disproportionate amount of expository…

  • Emmanuelle: The Joys of a Woman

    Emmanuelle: The Joys of a Woman

    The story of a woman who goes around fucking and fucking and then fucking some more. Better than the first.

  • Emmanuelle


    You can call this movie dated, you can call it problematic, you can call it whatever you want. What matters is that in the year 1974, it got Gene Siskel absolutely rock-hard.

    Contains an interesting and educational scene where a lady puts a cigarette in her vagina and blows smoke out of it. Directed by Just Jaeckin, which is probably what you’ll be thinking of doing at least once or twice.

  • Bloodfeast!: The Adventures of Sgt. Lunch

    Bloodfeast!: The Adventures of Sgt. Lunch

    I’m beginning to think I could get a Vinegar Syndrome partner company to release the movies I made with my parents’ camcorder on a beautifully-packaged, extras-packed Blu-Ray. If anyone from Saturn’s Core is reading this and would like a screener of Superwillie (Sloan, 1995), please get in touch. Anyway, this has a certain charm. Gonna give it a heart.