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  • La La Land

    La La Land

    ★★★½

    things mia did in one  night:
    - forgot she had a dinner date with her boyfriend and his brother and his girlfriend
    - went to dinner with her boyfriend and his brother and his girlfriend
    - zoned the fuck out during dinner
    - listened to the jazz music playing in the restaurant while thinking about sebastian
    - said fuck greg lives sebastian lives matter and then went ahead and ditched greg during a dinner with his family without any explanation…

  • Captain Marvel

    Captain Marvel

    ★★★★

    nick fury to people: you are a motherfucker doing some dumb motherfucking shit ugly ass bitch i have on eye left and i'm not gonna bother using it to look at you fuck you

    nick fury to goose: ᵒᵒᵒᵒ ʷʰᵒ'ˢ ᵃ ᵍᵒᵒᵈ ᵏᶦᵗᵗʸ ʸᵒᵘ ᵃʳᵉ ᵍᵒᵒˢᵉ ʸᵒᵘ'ʳᵉ ᵃ ᵍᵒᵒᵈ ᵏᶦᵗᵗʸ ᶦ ʷᵒᵘˡᵈ ᵖᵘᵗ ᵐʸ ˡᶦᶠᵉ ᵒⁿ ᵗʰᵉ ˡᶦⁿᵉ ᶦᶠ ᶦᵗ ᵐᵉᵃⁿᵗ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ʸᵒᵘ ᵍᵉᵗ ᵗᵒ ᵐᵉᵒʷ ᵃⁿᵈ ᵖᵘʳʳ ᵒⁿᵉ ˡᵃˢᵗ ᵗᶦᵐᵉ ᶦ ʷᵒᵘˡᵈ ᵈᶦᵉ ᶠᵒʳ ʸᵒᵘ ᶦᶠ ᶦᵗ ᵐᵉᵃⁿᵗ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ʸᵒᵘ ᶜᵒᵘˡᵈ ʰᵃᵛᵉ ᵗᵉⁿ ˡᶦᵛᵉˢ ᶦⁿˢᵗᵉᵃᵈ ᵒᶠ ⁿᶦⁿᵉ ᶦ ˡᵒᵛᵉ ʸᵒᵘ ᵍᵒᵒˢᵉ

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  • To All the Boys I've Loved Before

    To All the Boys I've Loved Before

    ★★★★

    cute and wholesome but my advice to my fellow women out there is that if a guy likes fight club, run the other direction

  • The Emoji Movie

    The Emoji Movie

    do you think god stays in heaven because he too lives in fear of what he's created